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The Carthage Press
How breast cancer is reshaping everything

www.takingitfromthetop.com
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About this blog
By Jennifer Denbo
I wanted to start this blog so other women, family and friends could see a real perspective into the life of cancer. Not just what I am experiencing, but what others may experience or see loved ones experience themselves. I am a mom of two girls ...
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Taking It From The Top
I wanted to start this blog so other women, family and friends could see a real perspective into the life of cancer. Not just what I am experiencing, but what others may experience or see loved ones experience themselves. I am a mom of two girls (Kaylee 10, and Sophie 4) and married for 11 years this year to my husband John Marc. We live in Rolla, MO and all of my treatments will be here at Phelps County Regional Medical Center. I was diagnosed on January 16, 2013, at 5:15 p.m. A moment in time I believe the Earth stopped turning, and my heart stopped beating. Even if it was for a split second. This blog was started January 21, 2013 at 6:22 p.m. when I was ready to speak. (and when my S.I.L. Claire was ready to help with the tech stuff:) I hope you enjoy taking this journey with me. I WILL beat Breast Cancer! I did not want to turn to Google for my answers, I wanted to find my own. These are them:
Recent Posts
Oct. 4, 2014 11:30 a.m.
June 21, 2014 5:25 p.m.
Jan. 26, 2014 5:15 a.m.
Jan. 16, 2014 11:20 a.m.
Jan. 10, 2014 5:23 p.m.
April 14, 2013 5:30 a.m.



Well tonight I have many many things running through my head . I think the realization of the BRCA coming back positive is really starting to set in. No one wants to know they have a genetic mutism that they could have passed on to their children or future children. I feel terrible about it. I feel like everyone gets screwed…and not just me. I may be messed up, but what right do I have to pass it onto to others? What right do I have to marry someone and have children with them…and they not know? The truth is it’s not fair for anyone…but sadly it’s reality.

So somehow someway I need to make sense of this senseless thing and move on. I guess knowledge is power and that’s a good thing right??? It’s better to know….than not know….right?

I have no clue really how to feel. I could shed a million tears over how this could impact my girls. That because of me…and this…they too have an 84% chance of getting breast cancer. But, on the other hand I am happy that they will be continually monitored and not have to wait the normal “40 years of age for a mammogram.” Because of this and I helping them? or hindering them? The truth is I bet it’s a little of both. How can a glass be both half full and half empty?

So tonight as I go to shut my eyes I will say I don’t know how to feel just yet. Every minute brings a new emotion and that’s just the facts.

I throw my hands up to God and say “I don’t have all the answers.. I don’t know why… I can’t explain everything… but YOU do and YOU can.” I have to live with the fact that sometime there is no rhyme or reason…there just “is.”

Good Night my friends :) xoxo

ps- this is how Sophie fell asleep tonight. I told her a story about how she use to crawl into my arms and I would gently brush her hair until she fell asleep as I sang her lullabies. I did just that, and she fell fast asleep. Just a reassurance that I didn’t want to think of anything else in that moment. Just live in it, and absorb every second:)

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